The Subtle Art of Kindness in a Nutshell
The subtle art of kindness is an issue that most be attended to. Kindness is the quality of being friendly, generous and considerate.
Kindness involves going out of your way for someone who needs help. It is a virtue that is valued in many cultures and religions. It is also a marker of basic human decency to be kind to people. As John Donne said, "no man is an island entire of itself". We all need each other.
As we are being kind to people, it is also important to remember to be kind to ourselves.
Ways to Show Healthy Kindness include:
1. Avoid the messiah complex. This refers to a state of mind where an individual thinks that he or she is responsible for saving or assisting others. They would go out of their way, many times at their own peril. It is important to keep this within balance. Understand that, to help people, you should not yourself be in a position where you also need help, thereby creating a situation where there is no one to do the saving or assisting both for you and for them.
2. Sometimes, allow people go through the consequences of their actions. This happens a lot between parents and children, and generally among loved ones. If you know someone who keeps making poor decisions and won't listen to correction, maybe it is time to let them be responsible.
Lessons are not always sweet yet everyone needs them to grow. It might hurt to see them go through pain but you need to understand that it is for their good. Though hard, it is the kind thing to do.
3. Set boundaries: Boundaries are an important way to maintain your space and keep your mental health in balance. Have principles and values that the people around you understand and must relate with you by. Boundaries are limits we establish to protect ourselves from being manipulated, used, or violated by others. Boundaries include personal, mental and physical limits.
4. Forgive yourself: There are times we do things out of poor judgment and later realize our folly. Don't be too hard on yourself. Learn your lesson and move on. Don't let guilt and shame eat you up. Find happiness and peace. It is the kind thing you deserve.
5. Pamper yourself: It is good to spend a huge chunk of your money on charity and most of your free time volunteering. If you do, it is absolutely commendable. But don't forget to eat good food and go for that spa treatment. Wear good clothes and exercise. It is all part of being kind to yourself.
Kindness in Strange Places
Kindness is not limited to the gigantic things only, hence the reference to it being a subtle art. It is also in a simple smile to someone on the bus, lending a helping hand to someone with a heavy luggage, sympathizing with someone in distress, and giving a sweet compliment to anyone including yourself.
Show kindness today!